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14. The Lines I Walk

  • Aug 16
  • 2 min read

Updated: 18 hours ago

There’s a ringing I can’t quiet, 

not in the ears,

but somewhere deeper,

where silence holds its breath

just before it breaks.


I wear a face I’ve learned too well.

I nod, I smile,

I say, it’s fine.

But the truth keeps blistering

beneath the mask.


This thing between us

is nothing if not beautiful.

It lit corners of me

long abandoned,

made the world shimmer,

then reminded me

I couldn’t keep it.


You give so gently,

and still, I bleed.

Not because it isn’t kind,

but because it is.


You walk the edges

like they were made for you.

But the ground tilts beneath my feet.

And I—I stumble

trying to balance on what breaks me


There is no map for this,

only the ache of knowing

what we are

lives just outside of yes,

just beyond no.


I’ve become the afterthought in my own story,

the silence that stretches too long,

the breath you take

before speaking to someone else.

I exist in the margins,

not erased,

just written in faint ink

you only see

when the light hits wrong.


And still, I ache in color.

Still wake with you

pressed behind my ribs,

like something holy

and slightly poisonous.


You made me feel seen,

but only in private.

Treasured,

but never claimed.


And it’s that split,

the sharp divide between being wanted,

and being chosen,

that has broken me most.


So I write this down

to bury what can’t be spoken,

to let the truth rot

where no one will touch it.


I write it down,

to remember the ache,

to honor what it cost,

to promise myself

this won’t be the thing

that ruins me quietly


Because if I don’t,

this longing will make a monument of me.

I will stand,

aching beautifully,

and endlessly alone.



 
 
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